Rollercoaster

Writing for today's Five Minute Friday Linkup
where bloggers free write for five minutes based on a prompt.

Today's prompt is  start

When you start off on a rollercoaster ride, you know it's not going to be a gentle trundle down the tracks. You know you are going to feel scared, maybe just physically, even if you know it's safer than driving in the traffic down the highway. You know at the beginning that it will be hectic but there's nothing you can do about it. You want to do it, you bought the ticket and it's happening. But anticipating the craziness doesn't help you not to want to throw up when your stomach gets left behind at the top of the track. 

I haven't felt well lately - nothing serious, just a cold that took a while to get over. And in my experience, there's nothing like feeling weak to get those contemplations going. If anyone ever asks me what the hardest part of parenting, or homeschooling is, I will have to say this: that when you aren't WELL, when all you want to do is crawl into bed and obey your body's screaming plea for REST you just have to keep going. I knew that when I started these journeys, when I chose to have more than a couple of kids and to homeschool them. I knew it would be a bumpy ride and that I would not always be strong for it. I don't regret anything. I don't think I was naive. But parenting is pretty relentless, and when I think back I know that I had no idea at the start what it would really be like to be at this point on the ride. 

My precious children - filling my life so full that sometimes I forget there was ever a void I hoped to fill with mothering. I am so glad I began this journey with them and I am grateful that now when I am weak they help me, even as they still need me so much. This rollercoaster ride has been a journey worth starting, and even though my stomach has been left behind somewhere I'm still happy for it not to be over quite yet!